What would you do when you have earnestly prayed to God about something and put faith that he would come through but he doesn’t. Let’s think about it while I explain my situation to you.
Let me start my story from last year which was not the best year, as I lost 2 of the grand parents. I should preface this by saying that all of my family stays in India while I stay in the United States. No only that but I am the only person who accepted Christ from my very traditional Hindu family. Despite praying earnestly for my family, I haven’t seen there hearts changed for the past 3 years.
So, while this is my circumstance my story starts 2 days back as I was praying for my friend’s grandfather who met with an accident. I put my trust in God and prayed with faith that he would be alive and God would heal him. But later that night I heard that he passed away. Which brought up in me a lot of emotions which were dormant until then and led me to question my faith.
It made me question my prayer. It made me question despite my prayers things continue to happen. I started fighting with God asking him why he is not answering my prayers and turning my family and their hearts to him. He is a God who works miracles and why is he not doing it in my family when I have been faithful to him. I started to make deals with him telling I won’t work for him until he saves my family.
Coming to the first question on what would you do, this is what I did initially when I was faced with this situation. Until I was in the situation I always thought that I would never leave God and his plans no matter what he doesn’t do. Like the story in Daniel 3.
“Shadrach, Meshach, and Abed-nego answered the king, “O Nebuchadnezzar, we do not need to answer you on this point. If it be so, our God whom we serve is able to rescue us from the furnace of blazing fire, and He will rescue us from your hand, O king. But even if He does not, let it be known to you, O king, that we are not going to serve your gods or worship the golden image that you have set up!” (Daniel 3:16-18)
Though that was my initial reaction. When I woke up the next morning I could not do what I thought emotionally the night before. I knew God’s love and I loved him too much to not be with him. Though I knew that his love could never leave me, I also knew then that I loved him enough to realize that no matter what God has planned for me and my family I could not leave him.
This situation taught me that no matter who you are, you will sometimes have difficulty with your faith and it will waver, but also that the love of God is the only thing that will draw you back to him in those moments. Also, it taught me to not take decisions when you are emotional. He is our father who understands us but also a father who loves you too much to leave you.